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Mireille Guiliano
Q. 1. I am a thin French woman despite the fact that I have been living for many years in this Bible Belt small city, where most women are indeed extremely overweight. But my slenderness is not due to a conscious choice. I simply don't like food, particularly French food, which makes me nauseous: too creamy, oily, sauce-oriented, etc. My question: what would you suggest for me to do in order to actually LOVE food? I do eat some because I need it to survive. I tend to find Mediterranean ways of cooking in the Midi of France, as well as simple Chinese or Japanese fare, less objectionable, somewhat tastier and less fatty. But I do not take any real pleasure in it, neither in preparing food nor in eating it. What would you suggest, particularly in terms of FOOD PREPARATION pleasure?- Cleo, College Station, Tex. A. I like to believe, Cleo, that everyone has latent gastronomic pleasures just waiting to be awakened and when they are, life only gets better. While my whole book is really the answer to your question, I will share a few big and related thoughts. You are obviously very sensitive; that can be made into a plus rather than a minus. Begin by slowly discovering some taste preferences and then cultivating pleasure in those. For instance, some people adore basil as a seasoning, others find it overwhelming. Try sniffing several alternatives: rosemary, sage, thyme. If rosemary, say, is appealing, at the level of fragrance, chances are you will like it in food (since much of taste is smell). If so, try the simplest preparation you can with a sprig of rosemary on a piece of fish or chicken, whatever seems more appealing, brushed with a bit of oil (grape-seed oil for instance is very nutritious and without flavor of its own) and seasoned with a bit of salt, perhaps a little squeeze of (fresh!) lemon. When you eat, concentrate on the new flavor, as well as the texture and the appearance of your menu portion. Even if you're not big on cooking, preparing food with our own hands prevents our being joyless alienation from what we are eating. Chop everything by hand (no machines). One of the great things about cooking is the relatively instant gratification you get from completing a task then enjoying it by eating. Don't you feel good about checking off little or not-so-little projects? Cleaning a closet. Getting past those income tax returns? Buying clothes for a special event? If you can learn to take pride in shopping and cooking, there are inner rewards there as well ... at least that's how I look at it and feel.Finally, I invite you to be bold and open minded in your approach to new foods. Some are acquired tastes. Think about sushi. Who would have thought raw fish would become a passion for people around the globe? You appear to like it. Some people still can't quite get up the courage to try. And no one says you have to like French food or any other cuisine. Certainly there are some that I like a lot less than others. As far as French fare goes, it is a lot different today than the stereotypical rich, creamy sauces of a generation ago. Since the 1970's it has evolved to be lighter and leaner and more Asian influenced, but that doesn't mean some of the bistro classic comfort foods don't have a delicious place now and again. And you don't have to go to Paris to experience the best (but, hey, go for it if you can); there are a host of wonderful French-American restaurants in the U.S., notably in New York and a few other major cities. Treat yourself to the best and see if you like it. At home, another tip would be to start tasting things you have never tasted before: a new vegetable or perhaps a cheese. Anyway, I'm glad you want to discover your gastronomic pleasures. Who knows? Good luck and bon appetit. Q. 2. I lived in Chalons sur Marne from August 1958 to the beginning of 1961. We could take the time to cook things slowly and enjoy them. How do you find the time to make the meals you write about? After working, commuting home, shopping and getting home I'm just too tired to think of cooking. Please, I want to change but don't see how.- Thilde Peterson, Henderson, Nev. A. I certainly understand this time dilemma: the belief or reality of too much to do in this life and too little time. And life's exigencies seemingly take away all discretionary moments. Still, it is really all a question of prioritizing and planning. In order to find the time, you have to commit yourself to finding it, convincing yourself that nothing is more basic to a happy and civilized life than a civilized relation to food. You owe this to yourself and your loved ones. You gotta eat, after all, why not make the best of it. Certainly in my professional life, I have to prioritize constantly and am amazed by the time-consuming demands that just are not important. They are the first to go to free up time for what's important for business or me personally. Can you find 30 minutes a night for cooking? 60 minutes? That's all you need. Shopping is another task, but that can be managed efficiently with a little planning. Most people in this country are extremely busy - or at least have convinced themselves they are by filling up the hours with all sorts of things - but quality of life revolves around the things we enjoy doing, not the things we have to do. And what's the point of getting everything on your list done without quality of life? Of course the workweek limits those of us who work outside the home. During the week, my preparations are much less elaborate than they are during the weekend. But there are many simple and delicious things one can make if one lets go the notion that cooking is a big job, with a big clean up afterwards. (My book has lots of no fuss recipes. I made that a priority. ) And home cooking makes excellent leftovers, so why not commit to cooking three or four nights a week and spend seven civilized nights. Life improvement guaranteed.Q. 3. Do you think there is societal
pressure or other inherent stress that causes some American women to binge eat?
Or that perhaps looking around they feel safety in numbers? But stress in our lifestyle definitely drives bingeing. It's almost as if we displace our anxiety by trying to devour it. Food becomes a substitute for emotional comfort. But bingeing is not a pleasure, it's a release, just as drinking too much is a release, and both are unhealthy. Like any other good thing, food can be abused, and certainly it's the most readily available thing to abuse. I know first hand, that a piece of chocolate can be a great pacifier, but can lead to a second and a third and then the box or bar is gone. That's bingeing, and you don't feel good about it afterwards, either. Again, know your own demon offenders and, as I explain in the book, learn to trick your mind into compensating in other healthy ways. Q. 4. Do you believe [the argument in your book] represents all French women or French women from certain types of areas, i.e. suburban vs. rural French women?- Sara Hinderer, Cleveland A. Perhaps people have been taking my title far too literally. It's meant as a provocation and a broadly true observation. There are obviously some fat French women, though admittedly fewer in urban areas. My argument is that, on the whole, French women, regardless of geography, don't get fat as long as they possess a traditional French relationship to eating. And the statistics overwhelmingly support that claim. I can't speak for the ones drawn to McDonald's, or to the growing number of immigrants who have perhaps not yet had the opportunity to absorb the gift of French gastronomy. Also, France is still an agrarian country with regional cuisine consumed in relation to fresh, local produce, so there's not a standard formula for what all French women eat. That's a point I embrace: eat what you need and enjoy but find your own equilibrium. And so long as we are talking about adult French women - say 21 or better 25 years old and up, there's no getting away from the significant cultural difference in my view between their relationship with food and eating for pleasure with women in other countries. Q. 5. It is my impression that the French smoke more than Americans. I have even heard it said that the decline in smoking in America is partly to blame for the rise in obesity. How does smoking play a role in French women's ability to stay thin?- Liz, Longmeadow, Mass. A. No, Liz, but I'm so glad you asked that question. This is a very popular myth about French women. And I am startled that people who have not read my book are writing to me and posting notes saying that French women don't get fat because they smoke a lot. Nonsense. It's as if they want a simple reason to avoid embracing a new approach to eating for pleasure and to dismiss the vast majority of French women who are simply not nearly as overweight as our American counterparts. French men do smoke more than American men (33 percent vs. 24 percent), but with women it's about the same (21 percent France; 20 percent U.S.). And a lot of those French female smokers are young women in their teens and twenties who have not found their equilibrium in relation to a lot of things, just like in America. Is obesity in America related to less smoking? Hardly. One might argue if one substitutes a cigarette for a snack, you might not get fat. But it doesn't appear smoking or non-smoking women in America are skipping their snacks or full plates, and women in France don't snack. So, I don't see the connection. I'm not a scientist, but while it's plausible that one oral gratification might be substituted for another if you don't have a properly cultivated relation to food, the transference isn't all that simple and smoking isn't the proven vehicle by any means. But as I tell in the book, I have known women who ate badly because they were smokers: smoking deadens the taste buds, and one eats more to get the same taste pleasure, often with a greater taste for fats.Q. 6. Are the recipes in your
book what you would term easy or time consuming, with common ingredients or
specialty items? Q. 7. How do French women and men
deal with sweets, pastries, desserts? How often do they eat them and in what
quantities? Q. 8. How do you adapt your
eating habits to accommodate a changing metabolic rate as you age? Q. 9. An etiquette question: why
do the French never place their bread directly on the dinner plate? Is there
some historical reason for this? Q. 10. How to win a French
woman's heart? Speaking now as a French woman, let me say that since we cultivate joie de vivre showing an appreciation for that is the key. Respect and enhance the enjoyment she derives using her senses in tiny thoughtful ways - some flowers for no reason, a divine piece of chocolate left for her to find with a sweet note. Champagne is great. All the old clichιs they became clichιs because they work and are used again and again. And be sure to be open to the pleasure of the senses yourself. American men can be so joylessly pragmatic sometimes and short of spontaneity, delight in the moment. Above all make her laugh, and that applies to all women the world over. |
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